I took the kids to the zoo today since they were out of school and I was off work. It was a wonderful 5 hours of sunshine and physical activity from which I may never recover. Early on in our visit, we rounded a corner to see some monkey-like animals (by this I mean, they looked like monkeys and probably smelled like monkeys but being the zoo, they were something with a longer name that started with an M). There were 2 squatting up on a branch and I'm watching them doing the usual Ooo-ing and Aaah-ing when I noticed that the monkey in the rear had some kind of stick or something poking up almost to it's chin. It moved a bit and I realized that we had apparently interrupted a VERY private moment for the poor little guy. It took a good few minutes before I realized that I'M STARING AT A MONKEY BONER! The kids had moved on before I snapped to and realized that the monkey was probably like "uh, a little privacy here?" and I moved on. I'll admit, too... I did have a range of thoughts from "Wow, some animals really do find sexual pleasure in the wild like I'd read about. Fascinating!" to "Hahahaaa, monkey boner!". Maturity at it's peak, here, ladies and gentlemen *slaps face*!!

There are days when it's really tiresome to be so painfully shy that you can't even update your wall on Facebook without re-reading, deleting and second guessing yourself to death. As luck would have it, I think I've passed the "party crier" syndrome on to my daughter. When I was young, I would cry at every birthday party for no good reason. Looking back, I think I was just overwhelmed with the number of kids and would start to think "wow, nobody's paying a bit of attention to me" and that would progress in to "nobody wants to talk to you because you're such a loser". My daughter is having a similar issue. Even now, I have to drag my kids to the store with me because when I go shopping alone, I think that people are staring at me and thinking bad things about me (usually at the grocery store... I feel like people are critiquing my cart and saying 'yah, you don't really need to be buying those chips, do ya chubbs?'). Unreasonable? Definitely. But I can't seem to help myself. This is probably the real reason why I don't update LJ as much as I really should. When I decide to write, I usually start and then talk myself out of it because I'm afraid of sounding pathetic. I should just get over that because it's good to get stuff off your chest whenever possible. It would definitely take the load off Nuke who has to listen to my incessant ranting when I get really good and wound up. I really should work on that. Maybe then I can even post a review on someone else's writing!

OK, so it's been almost a full year since my last post but I figure everyone pretty much knows what's going on in my life without my need to post. However, recent events are eating away at me and I just have to post about today's absurdity. My son has "cellulitis of the buttock" caused by a staph infection. It's as serious as it sounds. The worst thing I've experienced (to date) as a parent is having huge weeping sores on my 8 year-old's butt cheek and having him scream as I have to clean and medicate the area. Today we ventured to Wal Mart to pick up some necessities such as rubber gloves, gauze, a jumbo jug of hand sanitizer and some Lysol and while in line I spied those canvas bags that every eco-conscious person is supposed to be making the transition to. Despite the fact that I'm in the 10 items or less line, I go ahead and pick up about 5 of them. I worried momentarily about being over my item limit until I realized that A) there are no other checkout lines open at 7:30 in the morning and B) who gives a flark when my son can't even sit in the cart like a normal kid because his @$$ hurts too much. I check out without incident but as I watch the cashier ring up and bag my purchases I almost broke out into hysterical, no it would have been more maniacal, laughter. The cashier put my 5 canvas bags together inside a plastic bag. I think the stress is getting to me because even now, I still find that hilarious!

As far as the boy goes, it does look like it's going to heal. But I'm not taking any chances with it. I won't get the test results back until Monday to see if it's MRSA so I'm going ahead and taking him to a follow up doctor visit tomorrow at the local Urgent Care office. He's such an angel. I torture him with warm compresses and cleaning and medicating his infection and he still loves me more than Spongebob. That's saying something.

I'm having a frustrating time all around - so instead of unloading in my blog about how much I really feel like some people just need to get over themselves... I've decided to rant about a couple of my pet peeves. Ready? 

First of all, I read a lot of slash. I mean a LOT. Gobs. I've never claimed to be a grammatical or spelling dynamo but I at least know the difference between prostrate and prostate. Nothing chaps my ass more than to be reading a very steamy scene, which is otherwise written very well, only to stumble when the wrong word is used. These words are so very NOT interchangable people!!

Secondly, we are currently in daylight savings time. This means, that if you choose to use the 3 digit time zone abbreviation, you would use CDT. NOT CST. I had to suffer through 4 hours of training learning how to use a new system and the timezone is set to CST. Makes me wonder if the stupid thing is going to try and spring forward this fall. And it really, really makes me wonder about the intelligence level of the people who designed this new system. I make mistakes all the time, but that one is so blaringly obvious.

Next, ladies who don't know how to flush a #@$ toilet. Believe it or not, I was in the restroom when I actually heard a woman use the toilet. Leave the stall, wash her hands and leave the restroom. Yeah, unfortunately I couldn't help it and I had to glance in to see if she had flushed and I just missed it. Thank the goddess her toilet seat cover was still there so I didn't have a moment of insanity and think to look further. Ok, ew. 

Wow, thanks, I feel a little better.

 It's been a very long time since I've been this busy at work. It's kind of pleasant because the day goes by really fast and I actually find myself pushing to get what I need done by 5 o'clock. But, on the other hand, I'm ready for things to calm down. I dream about work, I wake up in the middle of the night and think about work... ugh! But, hey, I have a job and I'll just continue to keep doing my best. Yesterday we 'officially' took over the responsibilities for the manager who's leaving our team and I was stunned at what it did to my work load. This morning I'm going to try and convince my boss to let me hand off a different project to a peer. 

On a lighter note, Melissa's first inter-school concert is tonight! She's very excited and a little nervous. There are kids from the orchestra in 5 elementary school playing in tonight's concert. We went to the store on Monday and bought her a pretty dress and some shoes. My baby is so grown up.

 I think that someone moved April Fool's Day to April 2nd and didn't tell anybody. While working today, the power went out in our cubes...again. Not only went out, but BLEW UP. The surge protectors were popping and sizzling and smoking profusely - excitement! I had to work a few hours from home tonight and my son was anxiously awaiting his turn on the internet. For some reason I can't seem to get my router to support my dial in to the network as well as personal internet usage. Well, he's in to looking at cartoons on Youtube. I know the dangers there, believe me, but I figured that since he's right within listening distance and since he's looking at stick figures and Spongebob, it'd be ok. Well, that was until he came to me absolutely in tears tonight. My first thought was, OH SH!T! What did he see that has him traumitized?? I tried to get him to speak to me but he couldn't get past the hysterical hiccups... Finally he showed me what he saw. It was a homemade video of some kid who had taken a Spongebob figure and proceeded to do mean things to it. First he put a screw in his head, then hit it and finally setting it on fire - all the while you could hear "Spongebob" screaming in the background. My son is still crying horribly and clinging to me and I'm having to lie to him and say "no, honey, mommy's not laughing - I'm crying because it's just so sad". Jeez, talk about Mom Of The Year, here. This was just about the time that my daughter walked in and took a gander at the video and really started busting up with the laughter. This made my son cry just that much more. So, two major take-aways from tonight's episode. #1 - Do not let the boy watch videos at random on Youtube no matter what kind of filters are applied and #2 - toughen the boy up before he starts getting his ass kicked on a daily basis.

Today is my hunny's birthday!! I attended a lunch in his honour today... Sushi was on the menu. I tried a California roll. Not horrible, but not really my cup of tea. I'm really happy that I got to see him on his day. 

In other news... Still waiting on the closing for the refi. The economy sucks, I'm behind on my laundry and I need a haircut. On the happy side, though, I was able to get the order submitted to get someone out to fix the power in my cubicle. When he comes, I'm going to blame the lightning Monday and not mention someone's use of unauthorized heating appliances. I'm going to try and check out those books that Kiwi recommended for my daughter. I mentioned them and she was really excited. Right now she's reading some book about a mermaid. I can't remember the name of it. Something like the Tail of Emily Windsnap, maybe? Anywho, she left the book at school and it's spring break so she won't be able to get back to it until next week. 

Now if you'll excuse me, I think I'll go get that laundry started. Nothing like having some slave labo..oohhh I mean loving and kind children to help out! 

 Tomorrow, my love and I (along with the kids) will venture on our first road trip. We're going to Iowa for the weekend to visit his family and friends. I was pretty excited until today when I realized that we're going to Iowa for the weekend to visit his family and friends. How am I going to pull off normalcy for an entire weekend? OMG, I'm guessing by 2pm on Saturday, my honey's mother pulls him aside and asks if there's something wrong with me... Perhaps I was dropped on my head as a baby? Too much flouride in the water? Alien abduction? I've already decided that it's going to be rough. I have a touchy stomach and my daughter has an itty bitty bladder. Yeah, this is going to go GREAT! My son talks constantly and with him and my daughter both in the backseat - can we say battleground? Also, as icing on this pie, I was so busy getting my stuff together tonight that I forgot to have the kids take a bath before bed. So much for them looking their best tomorrow night when we arrive. Ugh, I am stressing my self out waaaaay too much :(

 I just had to take a moment out of my day to express how totally in love I am. I'm going to try very hard to always let him know how wonderful he is. For starters... He's very supportive. Last night, my back was hurting and he rubbed it for me. Sounds like a small thing, right? Well, when you've never had that before, it means everything. There's a very long list of why I love him so. That was just a taste.

Yaay! I finally heard back on my appraisal. It looks like the house appraised at the right amount and now the paperwork is on its way to the lender. It'll be a long time before I hear more (unless there's a problem) so it's all about the waiting now. Great, because I handle stress sooooo well!  

For those of you keeping score at home.... Tomorrow is my official 1 year anniversary in the new job. While technically I accepted the job in January, my negotiated release date was the 19th of February. Also tomorrow, the appraiser is coming by. I wonder if it crosses the line to offer some kind of bribe for a good figure. Out of respect for my love, I have already decided against the sexual favors. Perhaps some cookies and Dew...? Wish me luck folks!

Today was crappy. Not the overwhelming, in the toilet kind of crappy, but still. Me love was sick today and had to hoof it in to the office anyway because there were issues that only he can deal with. (He's such a smart feller). On the one hand I was happy to see him but I felt bad because he sounded horrid. He claimed he looked horrid as well, but I didn't see it. He always looks good to me ;)!  This morning, I was trying to be at work on time, but of course I was a few minutes late. It didn't help that I shut my finger in the car door. At least it doesn't hurt to type anymore. It only hurts when I bend my finger. So, I'm just pointing a LOT. Tomorrow is going to be a spectacular day, though. This is the Power of Positive Thinking!!

 I've managed to convince myself that the worst-case-scenario in regards to my home loan dilemma really isn't all that bad. WCS is that I don't get the loan and I get to go blow the wad of cash I'd been saving. I told my mom the plan this afternoon. She didn't seem to partial to that idea. As a matter of fact, there was middle name usage. When mother whips out the "Elizabeth" then you know that she's not liking what you're saying. Anyway, I think I just about have all of the information I need to send off to the first mortgage loan dude but I have another application out to another person so I just don't know which direction to go. I'll have to decide tomorrow because that's when I need to send off this one package plus the check for the appraisal. 

On a happier note, the kids' grandma is feeling better and there was talk of her having the kids over this weekend so me and the man can have some alone time. Hmmm, I'll have to give that one some thought as well ;)!

The redistricting meeting was tonight and I'm afraid it's bad news... Our new elementary school would be the school in the 'hood. The one with the 20% higher discipline rate for fighting than any other elementary school in the district. The one with the abysmal attendance because of the apathy of the parents - virtually NO PTA because no parents will step up and the school that has the most rental families, meaning, the most transitory students. Yeah. I'm pleased. Not to mention that the neighborhood's crime rate is one of the highest in the city and they have 76% free and reduced lunch qualified families. While I know that doesn't really say anything about the students, it does make me fear in my ignorance that those kids being obviously of less economic standing than us, would use that as a source of negative behavior towards my children. We did all write our appeals because the kids on the south side of our same street are going to the better school but the woman in charge of such matters is a hard-nosed bitch. She actually yelled at a parent in a budget meeting once, told him to "Sit his tubaned ass down". Yes, turbaned. As in, I wear a turban. So that's what we're up against. We made our very valid appeal about how it would be silly to have 2 school buses come down our street, one for the north side and one for the south side and hopefully we'll get some results. Otherwise, I can put in for a boundary exception each year but I'd have to provide my own transportation to the other school. Ideally, not a problem because the day care buses the kids to the schools, however it's subject to denial based on the number of kids enrolled in the school you wish to transfer to. I guess everyone has their concerns with the new district lines, but unless it impacts M or Z - I really don't give a shit. 

 It's so hard to engage in retail therapy when you have no money...

Tonight was the first "official" night of Karate. I am so proud of my little Z-man!! He didn't cry or fuss and did his moves to the best of his short-attentive ability... I was a parent helper so I had to hold the bag for the lil'uns. You would not believe how hard 7 & unders can kick! Luckily, they all missed my vitals and hit the bag. Next time, I may not get so lucky. Sis was in a different line and she did really well. Her uniform didn't fit so it'll be another 2 weeks before she gets one. She was very disappointed, as was I. 

In other news, Netflix claims that they're going to send me Mr. Woodcock by Saturday. If they do indeed accomplish this, then I can lay that on the table of movie options for me and my love to watch Saturday night. I can't wait to tell him!! If you're reading this, don't bother acting surprised when I tell you, LOL. K, now, off to bed with me!! 

I need everyone I know to keep fingers, toes and elbows crossed as I just filed my tax return. This sets in motion my GRAND PLAN of home refinance. Flippin ARM loans, don't fall for them - whatever you do!! 

 Now, THAT was the 5th level of HELL, kids!! Actually, it wasn't so bad, maybe second level. But, most importantly, the kids had a lot of fun so all-in-all it was worth it. I sure did miss my sweetie, tho :(. I can't wait until tomorrow so we can take the boy out for a nice lunch, just the 4 of us. I wish I was getting some more time alone with my squeeze this weekend, but alas - no dice. Kids are so hysterical sometimes. I had both of them with me when I bought Z's present - a copy of the Simpson's Movie. I even asked the boy, "would you like this for your birthday" to which he replied "yah, shuw" (in Z speak, that'd translate to Yeah, sure)... Why then were they BOTH so utterly surprised tonight when he unwrapped that? My kids are not good enough actors to have been pulling off that level of shock, either. I just looked at my daughter and asked her how she could have not known since she had just found it in the cabinet where I was hiding it not more than 3 days ago. Talk about outta sight, outta mind, sheesh! I think I'm going to call my BF Joe in my log, maybe...just so's you know - and knowing is half the battle.

 I have today off from work. My plan: Get the kids off to school, go back to bed, get up mid morning and do some editing, then go to the class registration for the karate/self-defense thing. Yeah, yet another shining example of how I should never plan. It was minus 1 degree out this morning so I decided since I was going to have the kids wait for the school bus in the car with the heater blasting, I may as well be dressed and go to the grocery store instead of putting that off. Then I did even more piddly tasks when I got home. Finally, I decided that nap was in order...so when I finally dragged my @$$ out of bed at 2freakin30 in the afternoon~~~Let's just say I haven't gotten much done. Oh well. I did have some really weird dreams, though. Too bad I can't remember them. So now I'm settling down to wrap my son's birthday presents and try and get a chapter edited before they get home in 25 minutes. Shyeah, LOL! Maybe instead, I'll just call my man since I do miss him so ;)

 Year at a glance... I started a new job (hence the lack of postage), met someone very special (squee!), and have been really busy with kid-type functions. I've committed myself, however, to start posting updates with what's going on round here. The new job is just the old job in a different format. Like doing exactly the same thing, in French instead of English. But the absolutely killer part of it is that with the new job/new location...I met somebody! Yaay ME! 

I had to drop quite a few of the kids' activities because I realized that I was just spreading us all too thin. Thursday they're going to check out a Karate/Self-Defense class but that's the first activity they're really involved in this school year. Otherwise, I've just been working hard and most recently performing some Beta work (which I absolutely LOVE).  Currently, I'm waiting patiently for my copy of Photoshop Elements for Dummies so I can make my own icons.

Oh, P.S. Nuke...  Alliance Agent Lawrence Dobson now appearing on the 4th episode, Season 1 of Psych. He's running a stress call-in line. However, if he can't even talk Jayne in to turning in the Tams, I SURE wouldn't trust him to talk me down from the ledge!